WhateverI'M LOOKING AT THE BIG SKY NOWMenuSkip to contentAboutA Brief Biography of John ScalziAvailability for Interviews, Appearances, Writing Work and Optioning Existing WorkBooks by John ScalziContact InformationGuidelines for Publicity, Blurbing, Unpublished Work, Retweets, Guest Blogging, Charitable Solicitations and School AssignmentsScheduled AppearancesSite Disclaimer and Comment PolicyThe Canonical Bacon PageThe Scalzi Creative SamplerSearch for:How I Keep Myself Amused on Long Flights, Part II: The GremliningApril 10, 2014UncategorizedJohn ScalziI am now being flung into sky in the westerly direction. I hope not to overshoot and land in the Pacific.— John Scalzi (@scalzi) April 10, 2014For those asking, yes, there is a gremlin on the wing. He's a trainee! He's kind of nervous so we're all trying to be encouraging.— John Scalzi (@scalzi) April 10, 2014The gremlin's supervisor is here. That's gotta make him nervous.— John Scalzi (@scalzi) April 10, 2014Uh-oh. Trainee gremlin apparently tearing up the wing all wrong. Supervisor shaking its head, writing something on a clipboard.— John Scalzi (@scalzi) April 10, 2014Now the gremlin has gone to a window to scare a passenger. The passenger in question: a small baby. I think that's cheating.— John Scalzi (@scalzi) April 10, 2014Small child is delighted and says "puppy" over and over. The trainee gremlin bursts into tears. This is a hard gig, man.— John Scalzi (@scalzi) April 10, 2014The supervisor gremlin is making the trainee gremlin stand in the corner of the wing. Oh, my. This isn't going well at all.— John Scalzi (@scalzi) April 10, 2014Supervisor gremlin on the phone now. Appears to be calling in an experienced backup gremlin. I'm feeling bad for the trainee gremlin now.— John Scalzi (@scalzi) April 10, 2014I mean, yes. The trainee gremlin is trying to destroy our plane and send us all screaming to our deaths. But a gig is a gig is a gig.— John Scalzi (@scalzi) April 10, 2014You try getting a job as a gremlin on this economy. It's either destroying planes or being garden statuary for ironic suburbanites.— John Scalzi (@scalzi) April 10, 2014So, yes, I have sympathy for this trainee gremlin – wait. Trainee gremlin has just pushed supervisor gremlin off the wing. Bold strategy!— John Scalzi (@scalzi) April 10, 2014Huh. Apparently, supervisor gremlin had wings. Hovering over trainee, glaring. Trainee gremlin looks frustrated by this plot twist.— John Scalzi (@scalzi) April 10, 2014But as it turns out, attempting to murder your supervisor is an accepted work strategy amongst gremlins! Trainee gremlin passes the exam!— John Scalzi (@scalzi) April 10, 2014The whole plane is cheering! Trainee gremlin takes an awkward bow, and then tries to dislodge an engine. Adorable!— John Scalzi (@scalzi) April 10, 2014And as we plummet out of the sky, we can di